Pootin's Economy

Oh dear what can the matter be 

Putin’s blinkered strategy 

Has Balls up the economy…

It has been a savage few weeks for Russia’s popular leader ‘Vlad the Lad’ Putin. The continuing oil decline has compounded a weak Russian economy, Western sanctions and the Rouble's continual death spiral. 

Putin’s Judo like maneuvers into Crimea and Ukraine has proved recklessness for the Western world, but righteous for dreamers of a greater Russia.

Whether this plan can succeed remains largely on the Russian pocket book; if a looming recession of pending misery can alter the hardy Russians point of view that will be the determining factor.

To remind us how we got here, you have cast back to a perceived weakness in the Obama administration and America’s war weary posture. 

After being involved in two exhaustive wars there was no public appetite for further action in that region or anywhere for that matter.

Europe was grappling with a lingering recession and Russia’s oil and gas pipeline was threatening stability among weaker EU states.

Putin saw his chance to shore up citizen pride and galvanize Russian nationals in Crimea.

The Crimea is an essential part of the Putin plan having lost the Baltic’s in the breakup of the Soviet Union, it was crucial to house their southern naval fleet.

Other than protesting loudly Putin knew that the West couldn’t do much to a swift annexation.

Nevertheless when it came to the Ukraine things started to get complicated. NATO Expansion had spooked the Russians since 89’ and according to Putin Ukraine was the line in the sand.

The former President Viktor Yanukovych resistance to popular demands from the Ukrainian youth sided with Russian loan guarantees and his allegiance to Putin. 

The Orange revolution eventually ousted him to the Crimea exposing lavish spoils of a kept puppet.

As the conflict in Ukraine merged into civil war, the downing of a commercial airliner, Malaysian of all things, highlighted the scorching denial Putin resides in. 

The former KGB officer stoned faced refutation of culpably illustrated how isolated he was becoming.

The West’s introduction of sanctions rather than an armed response initially played into Putin’s thinking nonetheless as the Russian economy soured combined with the fall in oil and imposed sanctions, Putin’s folly was becoming evident.

Russia needs oil to be at $100 a barrel in order to balance the books; it has reserves of $400 billion but foreign debt of $600 billion. 

The Saudis have said they will continue oil production with the possibility of prices dropping to $20 a barrel. 

That is a mother load of pain coming Putin’s way and without question self inflicted. 

The current situation is increasingly looking like the Bear Stearns and Lehman’s of Russia. 

In addition, the Saudis aren’t too enthusiastic to help Russia with its oil problem, for Putin has sided with the Syrian dictator Basher al- Assad, because they have a naval fleet at the port of Tartus which is of vital importance to Russia. 

The fact that Russia are purchasing aircraft carriers from France (which are on hold due to sanctions) illustrates how a mighty navy must go elsewhere for ships to be built. 

While dividing up the spoils among his friends, Putin did nothing to reform the huge country with a large talent pool. 

Instead he made sure the media was bought and any political agenda go unchallenged.

Oil adds up to ¾ of Russia’s exports and has not expanded its resources into a diverse economy for example, allowing an educated youth from the IT sector to exodus to Israel.

The fifty billion spent on the Winter Olympic Games sure could be needed now and underlines what can happen in a space of a year.

And like the Emperor with new clothes, Putin has a particular fondness for discarding clothing fit for media consumption. 

Whether the Russian people can keep up the pretense remains to be seen. 

Sony loses the plot…

Consensus is building among the blogosphere, etc that Sony’s submission to cyber hacker’s reeks of cowardice.

US intelligence reveals North Korea was behind the hack attack, and now we wait for the latest email leak to know how Seth Rogan really feels about Amy Pascal and Scott Rudin.

Sony has been in steep decline since the Discman and Walkman walked off a cliff, and let Apple conquer the digital music delivery service.

The Vaio computer department was sold off, leaving the Playstation and Movies to churn out eager profits for a once mighty conglomerate. 

The Playstation hack of 2011 affected 25 million customers, swiping personal information ripe for abuse, and now, the mother of all hacks reveals insipid overpaid executives’ juvenile banter, and sensitive business practices.

Clearly not happy enough that the ship isn’t taking on more water, it has pulled the very product that might be a steadfast reason for free speech.

The ‘Interview’ is a comedic satire starring Seth Rogan and James Franco about a plot to terminate the most well fed Korean in North Korea Kim Jong Un. 

This act of tomfoolery has had the top brass at Sony and even the White House in a tizzy concerning its content.

Kim Jong Un doesn’t appear to be laughing also, and allegedly ordered the ‘Guardians of Peace’ to counter this Act of War with an effective hack of Sony’s business infrastructure. 

Now ‘The Interview’ will not be opening on Christmas Day due to 911 style bomb threats. 

In fact it won’t be screened anywhere on DVD or online streaming. 

The holiday period is a lucrative time for the Multiplexes and they don’t want to jeopardize a potential holiday bonanza.

So well done Sony, you have managed to surrender to grapefruit faced leader of a merciless hermit kingdom, and sabotage the Cineplex’s argument that streaming movies is the death knell of cinema.

And please, for the sake of clarity, point out the irony, which a bunch of maniacs by the name of ‘The Guardians of Peace’ want to kill people with gleeful pride.

Remember Salman Rushdie, The Dictator, Team America and Borat? 

Even if the film were crap, why do need to bow down to pond scum like North Korea and give them and others license to curb free expression?

As it stands, round one goes to Hackers du jour. 

Let’s face it, Face - sitting is not a crime…

Jolly Hockey sticks I have been away from typing. 

A person with higher nobility and near perfect credentials has alerted me to a salacious story on the steps of Westminster. 

Last week a protest was in full throttle concerning a British government proposed ban on certain sex acts to be wiped off our TV and computer screens.

Quote. An amendment to Britain’s Communications Act (2003) put video on demand online pornography under the same regulations that already govern DVD sales and theatrical movie releases. Under the British Board of Film Censors rules, people in Britain are no longer able to pay for pornography that contains spanking, caning, verbal abuse, water sports, female ejaculation, fisting, or face-sitting. End quote.

Yikes…! I wasn’t aware there was a ministerial portfolio for porn, and if so he has choked three quarters of MPs favorite recreation. 

One can only marvel at the industrious lengths ministers go to, using valuable taxpayer’s money on such Dickensian acts. 

Looking over the shoulder of some MP’s one might see the pages of Fifty Shades of Grey, as much as a report on London’s new proposed airport.

Monty Pythons have been lampooning the Establishment since the Sixties. Their comedic insights remain eternal.

The Minister of Porn proposes female wanking, between morning biscuits and afternoon tea unsavory. 

However one senses a sinister trait and recurring theme – why is ok for men to spray their seed with vigorous delight when women aren’t afforded the same luxury?

Women on Top so to speak, presents a threatening call to action by those who claim jobs gone overseas are damaging the Treasury. 

These terrible face sitters might seek employment elsewhere and not pay taxes! ; Yet another blow against women and hence the irony.

Charlotte Rose, who was named sex worker of the year in 2013, organized last week’s face-sit-in.

She expands on the idea that this ban, denies female pleasure as well as economics where in an industry women make more money than men.

Perhaps one thing at least MP’s should be concentrating on is lowering college tuition; this might dissuade seeing their daughters on screen making up the balance of their student debt.

However the protest provided a keen sense of humor - face sitting sit in’s, placards that read “We Cum in Peace.” and “Vulvas Don’t Kill People, Revolvers Do.”

I guess at the end of the day where one stands on the issue depends on where one is sits, or is it the other way round?

 “

Say No No No !

Scotland is exhibiting suicidal tendencies, or at the very least, self mutilation and stubborn hubris. 

Sounds like banking…? actually far worse.

In a few days time the Scots will vote to remain a part of the Union or become an independence State. 

Polls indicate that the Yes vote is leading the charge.

Panic has consumed all of Westminster and excitement escalates throughout Edinburgh.

Alex Salmond the first minister of Scotland has put forward the idea that Scotland would be better off separate from the rest of the Union. 

With a outlook as foggy as the Mull of Kintyre, and with great skill, he has managed to bamboozle a delusional population.

However it does pain me to agree with David ‘Downton Abbey’ Cameron on this matter, but he and many other undesirables are perfectly correct in stating the obvious.

It would be a catastrophe for such an event to occur, and with so many unanswered questions to be hanging in the balance, only an act of a madman and crazed nationals could prevail.

So much dependency on oil and gas profits as a way of constant funding for a new Scotland is simply nonsense.

Even BP has cited that supply will eventually run out, hence a fracking desire throughout the country?

The banking community will leave for a more stable climate, including the Royal Bank of Scotland, the Euro and Sterling will not find a home in New Scotland.

Who pays for Scotland’s debt?  Mortgages will raise and the cost of borrowing will shoot up.

Will Alex Salmond declare that the Ruble will be the next currency? Or simply hand over military concerns to Putin?

Britain’s International standing will be diminished, and as a NATO partner will look increasingly ironic considering Russia’s continuing land grab.

New Scotland will have an uneasy admission to the EU, who would face similar European separatists. 

The age of voting has been reduced to 16, in a cynical ploy to inject pride to an unsuspecting youth.

And what desecration to one of the best graphic designs ever - The Union Jack !

News just in…Loch Ness has surfaced and is moving south…

So like the Drugs slogan "Just Say NO"

IPeep v IPrivacy

Breaking News! 

"Hollywood type people outraged at leaked selfie sex!!!!"

"Demand more digital privacy…"

Leading IT girl Jennifer Lawrence miffed at such a state of affairs calls for radical Jihad against the IVoyeur .

What more laws on privacy? From a Congress that rarely turns up, let alone talks to each other?

For now sadly that appears fanciful.

Celebrities are prime targets, especially women for such intrusion which is unpleasant at the very least, however this seems paradoxical for some Celebs who yearn for constant flash bulbs and dress and behave in a manner which is a megabyte away from full on fornication.

Can we site Miley Cyrus, Nicki Minaj, Madonna and even Prince?

Considering the choice of Smartphone’s these days, the  IPhone or Android can be a self inflicting Judge, Jury and Executioner - the Blackberry sales are too dismal for selfie sex.

Privacy is diminishing by the sound bite, megabyte whether we like it or not, and has been eroding at Mach 2 speed just like climate change and appears irreversible. 

It’s surprising to suggest that Google, Face book, Apple and all advertising companies are interested in your privacy. 

They want to know everything about you, even the manufacturer of sex toy you used in your Oscar winning mini screen epic.

Need I mention the NSA?

The smart phone is a potent weapon; the Cloud is not 100% safe – nothing is full proof, if you are happy with Cirque du Soleil salacious sex at warp speed, then don’t get your knickers in a twist if the world is invited to watch.

The ubiquity of the camera and devices to relay such events are working with you and against you.

There will be always trolls and undesirables willing to ruin your day - new means of technology just accelerate the misery. 

The brilliant Kate Bush just returned to the stage after a 35 year absence and requested her fans to watch the show rather than video it.

Perhaps photographing everything from breakfast to cats to copious copulation would be better served by committing them to memory.

Blurred Lines

It’s hard to know if one is in Iraq, Syria, Gaza or Ferguson these days, the images look alarmingly similar.

What is abundantly clear; since 911 America has adopted a combative stance in all streams of life.

CNN’s Wolf Blitzer has a show called the ‘Situation Room’, even his bloody name is threatening! (Although he looks like a senior citizen teddy bear)

The TV media on all sides are awash in exploding, swooping graphics that font large the words ‘Terror’ every second.

Embedded journalists look like members of SWAT teams, with the only distinguishably difference being the word ‘Press’.

Even some celebrities have entourages the size of football teams, and who are armed to the teeth.

This bunker type mentality creeps in like a thief and leaves us shell shocked, too numb to realize the change. 

A product of ‘Right to Bear’ arms gone haywire and cancerous killing cycle that is never allowed to end.

There are thousands of Ferguson's percolating all across America, a sorry lament to the neglect of failed cities that warrant more help than Baghdad, Damascus and Kabul.

American foreign policy worries more about foreign failed States (and Arms sales) than its own domestic States.

We care more, it seems for tribes and cultures that we can barley pronounce, than the mixed culture back home that is in dire need for harmony and respect.

How can America be the beacon of light when its own population is in ruins?

What example to the rest of the world can we set if we are drowning in social divide and cultural inequity?

The Pentagon military budget for tactical weaponry must be colossal, why not trade in those dollars to resurrect communities and provide jobs, a future and to help ourselves and others. 

Why can't we cross the blurred lines of distrust to the transparent lines of hope ?

Ten and 1/2 Pros of Scottish Independence

1. Susan Boyle denied British radio play.
 
2. Mel Gibson replaces the Queen as Head of State…. Oy Vey!!
 
3. Hatred of Maggie Thatcher intact.
 
4. No More RBS bailout.
 
5. Will become the Greece of the Northern Hemisphere.
 
6. Bay City Rollers Reunion confined to Scotland.
 
7. No more shit rugby players in the Lions.
 
8. Haggis stays in Scotland.
 
9. Donald Trump to build more golf courses.
 
10. Sean Connery forced to leave his house in the Bahamas.

1/2. Andy Murray back to his losing ways. 

Every Song is like Sunday, tuneless and grey

Something has to be done about Morrissey, yes that former puff pastry leader of the band The Smiths.

The world cannot stand idly by and let continue after nearly 30 years, any more sour sonic silliness from the man.

He is the purveyor of the perfect swindle, fooling bedroom Bedouins into a charlatan’s belief that you can write one song and rerecord it for an entire career.

How does one get away with the same tired melody, the same jangly guitar and vocal delivery that scorched every track since the early 80’s?

These crimes perpetrated against the pasty, spotty adolescents have done irreparable damage to the social order.

It’s tantamount to musical pedophilia.

Conventional wisdom states that Morrissey was a precursor to the Beiber, Cyrus and Nicki Minaj travesty, soliciting permission to bore on a grand scale.

Not content to torture us through the art of the song, now he invites us to another piss poor performance of spoken word pretense, backed by third division jazz.

Listening to the protestation of a Brazilian goalkeeper would be more desirable than listening to Mozzer.

The man from Madchester has relocated to LA, that cultural void so in keeping with everything he apparently railed against as a guru for the depressed.

It would not surprise me in the least, if he has a suite at the Mirage Las Vegas, and is in talks with Siegfried for a comeback. 

Misery loves company and both have a penchant for shirts open to the waist.

Caliphates in Western clothing

As the ISIS (Islamic State in Iraq and Syria) brand gathers speed across Iraq and the Social Media, so does the speed of denial from the architects of a delusional vision. 

These caliphates in western clothing are too numerous for fingers and thumbs, but a premiership league table must include Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Rice, Powell, Bremer, Wolfowitz and Blair. Congress isn't far off either.

In a recent Wall Street journal piece, monster in Chief Dick Cheney stated that rarely has a U.S. President been so wrong about so much at the expense of so many.” 

Could this be in reference to his former boss Dubya ?

Let’s hope so for the sake of correctness and while American and allied men and women were losing their lives sold on a fake pretext, old Dickey was helping KBR bring in forty billion in profits, a Halliburton subsidiary.

And now signatures are multiplying for Tony Blair to be ousted from a diplomatic role in the Middle East. 

The special relationship between him and Bush has left the whole region in complete chaos.

With leaders like these, who needs radical Islam?

Saddam Hussein was quarantined in a box not going anywhere - yes a monster in a box, but like Marshal Tito in Yugoslavia he kept a tight lid on ethnic tensions.

In an imperfect world, it was the best solution.

Jo Biden, who has been sidelined as a laughing buffoon rightly called it.

"Iraq needs to be broken up into a federation if there is any chance of cohesion because we have just unleashed a colossal disaster."

The West doesn’t understand Islam and probably never will. 

Nouri al Maliki doesn't care about Sunni’s and as a result played the West into thinking a secular Iraq could exist. 

If the American trained Iraqi troops are unzipping their uniforms and fleeing and not fighting for their homeland, why on earth should the West care about their country?

There are no reasons for more flesh and treasure to be deployed, Americans in particular would rather have Detroit rebuilt and watch the World Cup than have anything to do this unsolvable region.

But by way of justification we could send the aforementioned leaders in a herd of Humvee's and let them see the wisdom of their ways.

Death Revisited

The recent blotched execution of Clayton Locket reignites not only the Death penalty debate but perhaps the method of termination.

Whether you agree or not with the death penalty in America or anywhere for that matter both have worthy arguments. 

However, I find it odd that here in America one can’t get a hold of a three drug cocktail to administer for the less perceived way of extinction.

In the past America has got its supplies from Europe which now has boycotted such drugs, and Pharma USA are less keen to be associated with States that carry the death penalty. 

Hmmm how uncomfortable.

While new drugs are being sought might we stage a comeback for the rifleman or woman?

As we know, it’s easier to obtain a handful of bullets than it is to secure a restaurant reservation. 

With that in mind wouldn’t it be more cost effective to hire a sniper, with one precise shot to blot out life?

Just think of the advantages; no doctor stumbling over Hippocratic Oath, bullets plentiful and cheap. 

Heck we could get an anxious ridden teenager to comply! (but no Selfie’s)

Ah the possibilities…

Free speech if you can afford it…

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more corrupt Union, establish Injustice, insure domestic Chaos, provide for the common man and women complete disgust for its bribed legislators, promote the Corporate Welfare, and secure the diminishing of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

Sounds about right…

Just when Congress gets an all time low on popularity and functionality, the Supremes (SCOTUS) vote 5 to 4 in favor of unlimited personal donations to campaign elections. 

However there is still a limit on individual money to an elected official or incumbent - Whoopee!

With a wafer thin hold on reality, The Supreme Court with chisel in hand chips away another layer of democracy.

Chief Justice Roberts declares it’s a question of Free Speech, which translates as drowning out the cries of the less affluent majority.

In effect, super empowered citizens can have their concerns addressed while the less prosperous are increasingly marginalised. 

With the flood gates opening, a tsunami wad of cash can now fill the airwaves and pummel eyeballs with Ads Ad nauseam.

How can the most honest (!) of politicians resist money of this magnitude? ; As long as the two party system remains in place, both sides perpetuate the scam and leaves the constituent drenched in apathy.

We have Harry Reid, the Senate leader loathing the Koch Brothers not just because of politics, but because he’s only a millionaire to their billions - how does that benefit the average citizen?

Putin must be laughing at the Russian style oligarchy at play here.

The temptation to disengage from voting when the wealthy are the ones that dictate and reap the rewards is palpable. 

If voting has any value at all, it at least it gives you the right to bitch and moan.

Frank Underwood in the House of Cards might have got to be President without a vote. 

It doesn't mean we should go there too.

So like the advert for the War on Drugs: ‘Just Say No’ followed by Nike’s ‘Just Do it’

Vote all of bastards out and start a fresh.

Primetime Pantomime

Sunday evening is normally reserved for Masterpiece Theater, a delicate Pinot Noir and remonstrating oneself for being absent from church.
 
Sitting through hours of the Grammys is normally deemed unsafe and falls under the category of ‘don’t try this at home ‘
 
But the highlights got me so lathered up I couldn’t resist a righteous rant on such a putrid affair.
 
The first couple of music, Bey and Jay put on a display so nonsensical that there and then I should have gone back for a second bottle. 

How in the world does an angel like Beyonce with everything going for her, bend so low in order to compete with Miley Cyrus?
 
But apparently I am owed some savage punishment for my sins (many I hear you say) and boy was it punishing!
 
I am all for gay marriage and all, but really does it have to be under a Moonie laced service with Madonna / Joan Rivers as the high priestess? Open your Heart? Say a Little Prayer more like!
 
And you know it’s all over when Ring Starr sings better than Paul McCartney, and Queenie Eye? WTF was that? 

If Paul, Madonna and Joan Rivers want to swap faces, please don’t do it in public.

And whose brilliant idea was it to have China’s Liberace Lang Lang playing with the Monsters of Morons Metallica. 
Lang Lang playing with his elbows would have been more preferable, Oh wait he was.
 
Taylor Swift had five minutes worth of song to find a melody but alas couldn’t achieve one.
 
And then from the heavens came Pink bellowing louder than Church Bells evidently desperate for a Cirque du Soleil audition.
 
Clearly the Cruise liner had come into port when Chicago and Robin Thicke teamed up; I really did think I was on the Love Boat.
 
Lou Reed perhaps would feel thankful not to be included in this Primetime pantomime, for there was little in the way of recognizing his contribution to music; nor the greatest male singer ever to sing, Ritchie Havens.
 
However there were some triumphs; Daft Punk winning and getting people to dance (remember that)
Stevie Wonder's inclusion was a breath of fresh air, at least he can still sing and the wonderful Nile Rodgers reminding us how to groove with style.

Young newcomer ‘Lordes’ broke through with an atmospheric song called Royals.

And country singer Kasey Musgrave’s, who can write a good song, and raise the roof without raising her voice gave us hope that not all is doomed.

Oh and Kanye West was nowhere near the building…

Sadly the great Pete Seeger has passed away, while no one would wish to see him in a pair of cut off’s, he represented so much about music that we have lost.
 
He once said there are plenty great songs never played on the radio. And this can be said for TV as well.

Now where did I put my corkscrew and Bible?

Power of Seduction

Zut Alors don’t you just love the French sometimes, once in a while their haughtiness becomes so endearing,it does merit a rest bite from the hackneyed proceedings of Congress. 

If you want a mild distraction from the gridlock of American politics, look across the pond and get a loada of the latest Gallic gossip.
 
French President François Hollande seems to be in a spot of bother, concerning revelations of an affair outside of an affair (very French). 

Hollande has never been married, but has sired four children with Ségolène Royal a famed socialist who ran for National office against Nicolas Sarkozy.
 
It was his current mistress (probably ex by week’s end) Valérie Trierweiler who while politically aligned supported Ségolène’s rival adding vixen venom into the mix.
 
Valérie Trierweiler known as the Rottweiler in polite society is a columnist at the top French magazine Paris Match. 

This makes a busy schedule being a commenter and first Lady of France, but in recent interviews marginalized the need for marriage (maybe a rethink there).
 
So onto Julie Gayet, an eighteen year younger version of Trierweiler weighing in at a nubile 41years young to Hollander’s 59 years old. 
She has managed to steal the affections France’s top baguette according to Closer magazine.
 
What separates French affairs from let’s say American affairs, is the almost cinematic charm of clandestine activities. 

Reports surface that President Hollande would arrive on his scooter to the apartment of Julie the actress.
This could be a scene out of a Francois Truffaut film, compared with Bill Clinton, who couldn’t be bothered to walk over the Oval room’s carpet for his night of cigars.
 
While Hollande’s approval rating is hovering in between Obama and Congress, the latest French poll among women would you believe indicates a healthy leg up!
 
This must suggest that France wants a diversion from a gloomy economy or that Rottweiler is a calculating cow ripe for comeuppance, or Hollande, not exactly a Renoir painting can be ‘Aimé par les dames’ then there lies the fortitude of hope for the last in line for good looks.
 
Recent developments (uncertain whether related to the scandal) draw upon Gallic character with joyful hilarity.
 
A truck full of horse manure was dumped outside the French National Assembly. No doubt the SWAT team was alerted for fly removal, but just imagine if that were to happen at the steps of Capitol Hill?
 
The power of seduction might get you 'femmes intelligentes chaudes', but also it can get you into a whole pile of shit!