Thursday, April 21, 2011

B.C. Before Cadbury's


Breaking News...

Archeologists have just made an important discovery, fragments of multicolored tin foil have been found at the Cenacle on the Mount Zion. This allegedly was the location where Jesus and other notable Foodies had the Last Supper.

Mortimer Bottomsworth Rhodes Scholar and professor of Confectionary at Christ Church College Oxford and his trusty crew of day labors found what appear to be Cadbury Cream egg wrappers. This startling development has thrown the whole culinary world into total consternation.

In what could only be characterized as a Christian food fight, and speaking from an undisclosed location (Wal-Mart aisle 4, Newark, New Jersey) Professor Bottomsworth enthused that previous conclusions of the menu contained the usual fare of the day; herb encrusted lamb, lemongrass shish kebab, apricot pork Provencal and a scrotum sack full of chicken Mac nougats wasn’t at all what was consumed that night.

Professor Bottomsworth further added. "Its no wonder Judas bashed out on sugar turn chocoholic Jesus into the authorities."

"The Eucharist must review its snack policy if we are to revise this historical breakthrough. From now on Sunday Communion must serve chocolate eggs and Cadburys at that. I am totally convinced that congregations around the world would swell and even Muslims will convert. This is a Win Win, as they say Seminary School".

"It makes perfect sense why Jesus would raise from the dead and most likely that he invented the Dow Jones".

"Cadburys stands to become the biggest publicly traded company in the world. And they don’t even have an App for that!"

"It is abundantly clear to me, the professor frothed “BC means Before Cadbury’s”

Comments from the Vatican and the Archbishop of Canterbury voiced displeasure with these findings claiming Professor Bottomsworth a Heretic and unbridled opportunist. However reports reveal they both have opened an E* TRADE account.

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