Pensioners Rock !

It is hard to comprehend that Ringo Starr has turned seventy and that his ex bass player Sir Paul is two years behind him at sixty eight. Both are still exhibiting performances that artists from any age can learn from. Another artist of lesser fame is approaching sixty in December,her name Joan Armatrading.

While not as high profile as say Joni Mitchell (but just as talented) she has been around the scene for almost forty years.

The 1976 smash hit "Love and Affection" became an instant classic for soft mood lighting and a easy passage to the bedroom. After a torturous day of listening to the Mel Gibson tapes one was deservedly entitled to a night of artistic integrity for good cheer.

It's a barmy summer's night and,Me,Myself,I is in Times Square with 70's punk raconteur and star photographer Richard Longo Burrows. The audience reminded me of the characters on Antiques Road Show, only they knew what the night was worth.

Joan appeared in only what could be described as a mandarin collared pair of pyjamas and sensible fitting sandals clearly comfort over glamour. Over the decades gravity has tamed her famous helmet Afro into a brushed down look more in tune with a history professor.

But don't let that fool you, strapping on her Tom Anderson guitar and augmented by a stealth band comprising of bass, drums and keyboards they slid into "Show Some Emotion" the 1977 jazz flavored hit.

From there, without pause she broke into songs from her new album This Charming Life.These songs noticeably had a more blues feel to them and displayed some wonderful Clapton type playing which came as something of a surprise.

With her faint warm Birmingham accent she greeted the audience and lay hints to some of the songs we would be hearing. The hits ? of course, we are here to make you happy she beamed.

With that she put her twelve string Ovation guitar on and plucked the opening chords to "Love and Affection". Brilliant as it was, it wasn't the show stopper as she ran through many of her well known songs "I love it when you call me Names","Me, Myself, I", "Willow" and "All the way from America".

It was "The weakness in Me" that showed the soulful yearning in her voice that hasn't over time been lost.

There was a new song that she wanted to get the audience participation on "Best dress On" .It is a great pop stomp that invites the crowd to shout out the chorus until the band decides to finish the song. All along the tour she has been measuring the crowds response to this song and posting the city with the best collective lungs on her website.

Naturally New York took up the challenge and tore off the roof. The energy level had increased and after nearly two hours,this almost sixty year old was was launching into her final song "Drop the Pilot" a wonderful climax to a fantastic show full of warmth, fun and admiration.

If there are any youngsters out there who want to know what professionalism,endurance and real talent is like, and what it takes to have that, then look to the artists who are travelling for half price on Municipal transport.

Despicable Me

Currently topping the cinema charts there is a 3 D animated kid's film called Despicable Me.

Is there likely ever to be another Mel Gibson film topping the charts in the near future ?

With his recent audio atrocity that is sure to become a podcast best seller, it would once and for all declare Mad Mel crucified and buried. It appears that Mel's Lethal Weapon is not a gun, but a foul bigoted temper far more explosive and potent than any bullet could penetrate.

Why it took so long for the sycophant Hollywood and Evangelical creeps to resurrect good sense is beyond me. I guess it had something to do with money. And seeing that the Mel money well has run dry, we are now left with the apologists who lie silent in the Edge of Darkness to renounce their association; Brave Hearts all of them.

Another despicable-list who must be breathing a sigh of relief is Rape-manski Polanski who just escaped again the clutches of California law. Once more we find the same putrid hypocrisy drifting up from the Hollywood Hills and polluting the minds of the liberal righteous who furtively believe that brilliance equates immunity.

I bet if one of their sons or daughters were raped by Steven Spielberg one hopes they would have something meaningful to say on the matter.

I leave you with wretched wisdom of Whoopi Goldberg who on ABC's The View offered this defense of Polanski in the sodomy of a drugged child " I know it wasn't rape-rape. It was something else,but I don't believe it was rape-rape"

Despicable indeed.

Fraudulent Heart

A wretched silliness is upon us, yes peeps Valentine’s Day is close by. The modern day scoundrel known as Hallmark has high jacked the world with the crass notion that there’s a special day for love and amorous behavior.

As with all those other days such as Mother Day and Fathers Day we are subject to fall in line with this nonsense and celebrate only one day in the year the joys of love and appreciation of parents. What bollocks!! Fraudulent matters of the heart are at play here.

And talking of matters of the heart, reports of Tiger Woods trying to win back his wife with a multimillion dollar yacht if true, seem tacky and give raise to the idea that perhaps the rich and famous reach for forgiveness by way of stadium size bling !

Same could be said of the LA Lakers Basket ball star, Kobe Bryant who after admitting having an affair bought his wife a four million dollar ring. Maybe it is a simple case of spurned women making their men folk pay big, postponing the threat of divorce inviting wipe out of far more assets. Whatever the reasons Cupid‘s arrow is way off target.

Happy New Year !

Thank goodness 2009 has left us, while you are making your resolutions for 2010 (make a resolution not to make a resolution) ponder on ten things that might happen in 2010.

• Tiger Woods dates Susan Boyle and brings to end the

40 year old virgin.

• Jeff Bridges finally wins a Oscar.

• Move your money (if you have any) to a community bank.

• Bob Dylan rescued from singing Christmas songs.

• Flying naked a real possibility!

• The Sarah Palin sex tape.

• Michael Jackson sightings with balloon boy.

• Charlie Sheen gets sent to Guantanamo.

• Oprah comes out of the closet.

• A Taliban porn site.

Sexting Handicap

Ah yes texting, that compulsive distraction that can tarnish halos, wreck marriages and soil brands. It has been widely reported over the Thanksgiving holiday that Mrs. Tiger Woods caught her hubby receiving a text from one of his many saucy sinners.

Oh what thanks on giving the rest of us lesser mortals the realization that you are imperfect.
Grim as it must be for Mrs. Tiger, those clever managers who have skillfully grown the first billionaire sports star must be thrashing around in their bunkers working on damage control.

As Tiger morphs into Cheetah what is hilarious is the righteous indignation from the ladies who claim to be the only ONE having a Tiger transgression. The list of sexters seems to grow by the day.

If by some strange reason sponsorship evaporates, the Cheetah will have to just rely on his future winnings which by current standards would make most sentient beings joyful for many lifetimes.

Who’s next Roger Federer ?

Harvest for the world

The war in Afghanistan is as much about drugs as it is about eradicating terrorism. The effort to get indigenous farmers to produce crops other than heroin seems futile. The demand for drugs across the planet and particularly in the US is insatiable.

Perverse as it might sound, controlling the drug flow and its subsequent profits would pay for the national debt and some. The Taliban and Al Qaeda derive their funds from the drug trade, why not spoil the party?

The worlds appetitte for drugs is relentless, they are here to stay, just like sex and the Yankee’s !
We glorify alcohol and tax it, why not go all the way and do the same with narcotics?

We already propagate drugs they just happen to have corporate names like Merck, Pfizer, Johnson & Johnson, Bayer and GlaxoSmithKline. End the nonsense now, legalize drugs and harvest a product which no better or worse than alcohol and tobacco.

Just imagine… a seductive Afghan female stretched across a gleaming Mustang, blowing smoke rings from her opium cigarette.

Unlikely? perhaps, but you never know…

It is quite fitting that we have just honored Veterans Day / Remembrance Day. In commonwealth countries such as the UK and Canada, people buy poppies to signify the battle field covered in red poppies, a metaphor not lost on the drug war which is costing lives in Afghanistan. It is blatantly clear the mission there has become unfocused and confused.

Some call for more troops, if that's case then send them to Pakistan to secure their nuclear infrastructure. The country is in peril. It would make better sense, an objective the American people could fully comprehend.

President Karzai is a puppet and throw back from the Bush years, his shelf life has expired. Historically the British and the Russians know something about this region and indeed Gorbachev has called for withdrawal of further engagement.

An exit from this 9th century BC country needs to be recognized and communicated. Not very many NATO countries are putting boots on the ground in harm’s way. Why should the Americans and British carry the majority of the burden and the blood ?

No pressure then...?

It would not be an exerageration to say that this year’s recipient of the Nobel Prize for Peace was a shock. And yet the winner, President Barack Obama was as surprised as anyone.
“I won WHAT!!!!!...not even Kanye West is going to protest!”

Even his White House staff hadn’t any inclination. This is what happens when you go to Scandinavia with your foxy wife and loose the bid for the Olympics, you end up with a Nobel Peace Prize.

In fact I wonder if there was a mixed up on who was on what committee?

Or perhaps Michelle arranged it, a small gift for their seventeenth wedding anniversary.

Whatever the reason it certainly caught everyone off guard.

Maybe the Norwegians know something of an impending attack on Iran and this is their way of deterring such a disaster in the making. Or this is a final condemnation on the Bush / Cheney legacy, who wouldn’t know how to spell the word peace, let alone its meaning.

It is baffling because President Obama is prosecuting two wars (Although not of his making) and hasn’t yet closed down Guantanamo bay, Hmm…Not much peace there.

The World’s love affair with Obama is certainly endearing, but he hasn’t accomplished much yet and while his potential is large there must be some unease among his supporters to the reality of the Messiah mentality. His detractors are going to have a field day with this, I wonder if the Nobel committee is comprised of Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Bill O’Riley and Glenn Beck; the ‘I wish you to fail brigade’.

It would appear that the message here is; Hope, A call to action and a more multilateral approach to solving problems. Thankfully in the President’s acceptance speech he gracefully articulated a balance between humility and a combined effort to search for peace.

No pressure then?