Saturday, January 12, 2013

Cycling Crimes



If one was of a religious persuasion the route to forgiveness or absolution maybe your Priest, Rabbi, Imam or local hair stylist.

For celebrities it is the TV screen or the cellular screen for such acts of atonement or admission.
Celebrities whether worthy or not have a number of gods they can turn to for salvation. 

One such God or Goddess in this case is Oprah. Oprah’s confessional couch has a large viewership whereby one, might have a fair hearing. 
Next week it’s to be Lance ‘Louse’ Armstrong's declaration of guilt to cycling crimes.

This is indicative of the garish world we inhabit, a world where many bare themselves like a Bergdorf window display, every nuance exposed for mass consumption. 
Cameras and social media in some conspiratorial cement have afforded us instant replay of our daily minutia.

Narcissism in overdrive.

But back to Armstrong; what can we expect from a serial deceiver, some form of soft landing onto Oprah’s cushions that will airbrush away the fact millions of people were fooled into years of delusion?

Perhaps it’s premature to voice what could transpire from such a spectacle. Much chatter and suspicion has emerged 
to how godly Oprah could handle such a event. 
Rather like interviewing Bernie Maddof minus the suicides.

Oprah needs ratings for her new show which has not fared to well unlike her former network show. 

To have the scoop on Armstrong’s potential atonement might serve her needs, but will do little in way of convincing the general public that Armstrong should be forgiven. 

If Saint Oprah has any influence this could be a genuine moment to declare ‘do people really care if their sports heroes are taking drugs? ‘

The stadiums are full, season tickets are snapped up, and concessions fill our belly's with expansive joy. Clearly the public have voted with their pocket books with bums in seats.

If that modicum of truth was realized then at least we would have some honestly in a dishonest world.

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Red Rogue



Evidently Belgium is not big enough for the French rich looking for tax shelters.

We learn that Russia, with its usual criminal charm has granted Gerard Depardieu full citizenship. 
Whether he takes up this offer remains to be seen. But judging by his enormous appetite for sloth he should fit well with the confines of the Russian gang-literati.

With all the refinement of a Bordeaux vintner, departing Depardieu provides us with a real time cinematic ‘Green Card’.

Will he knock up some Russian Tantric tennis babe and mount the Kremlin throne and denounce France to the dogs? Or could this be a Putin ploy to have all France become Russian?

Considering Russia has a flat tax rate of 13% this PR stunt serves well to a diminishing French lifestyle in need of some restoration.

Apparently he is a star in Russia by promoting a credit card of a well known bank, and credited no less with being a cultural ambassador from France - conspicuously the Russians have a sense of humor. 

For now a petite village inside the Belgium border furnishes grumpy Gerard with all things French, but close enough to hurl foul mouth rants into neighboring motherland.

From his apartment he is within sight of the drapeau tricolore limping in the wind like the French economy. 

Interestingly the Russian flag is quite similar to the French flag just in case he has a change of heart or fortune.

As the Clash song sings ‘Should I stay or should I go?’
Mr Depardieu clearly has gone, perhaps with ‘Red Card’ in hand.